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Activity 7.3 Document for Analysis: Lost in the Cloud

Activity 7.3 Document for Analysis: Lost in the Cloud

Q In the following interoffice memo, product manager Alexandra Amato reports to CEO Mason Razipour the high points of a workshop he asked her to attend. Alexandra's jumbled memo offers solid information, but it is so poorly written that it fails to achieve its purpose. Your Task: Analyze the message and list at least five weaknesses, then re-write it (making sure to use the proper memo format) Date: July 10, 2018 To: Mason Razipour, CEO From: Alexandra Amato, Product Manager Subject: Cloud Computing Some time ago you signed me up to attend The Promise of Cloud Computing workshop. I did attend it on July 8. Herewith is a short report, as you requested. If you prefer, I could give a presentation about what I learned at the next management council meeting. Is that meeting coming up in August? Okay, here's my report. I know you asked that it be brief, so will do! Lisa Moritz, the workshop leader told the group that the big problem today is that in this anytime/anywhere workplace employees are working with tons of devices from various locations. With employees scattered around, software and file storage must be accessible anywhere, anytime. It can't be on one type of device, and it can no longer be stuck in one place to be accessed with incompatible devices. Lisa told us that there are three main ways that cloud computing can improve the workplace. No. 1. Cloud computing makes it possible to access nearly all types of applications or software. A vast number of cloud-based services (e-mail, online storage, online file transfer) can be made available to lots of users—without the problem of compatibility. Another big benefit is the promise of making employees more efficient. How? Free access to unlimited ways to provide on-the-spot solutions eliminates searching and downtime. Cloud computing is also a way to improve communications. It completely transforms the way work is performed. Lisa didn't tell us exactly how this was accomplished, but she said that cloud computing makes for a happier, mentally healthy atmosphere all around. This is just a bare-bones summary of what I learned. If you want to hear more, please do not hesitate to call. Note: This message is formatted as an interoffice memo.

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The weaknesses are the following: • Poor choices of word • Use of slang throughout the official document • Poorly written sentences • Lack of concise language • Unworthy content to mail to the CEO • Missing full contact information Revision: Memorandum DATE: July 10, 2018 TO: Mason Razipour, CEO FROM: Alexandra Amato, Product Manager SUBJECT: Cloud Computing It is a pleasure for me to report that I attended a wonderful workshop on July 8th, named “The Promise of Cloud Computing”. As demanded, I have prepared a brief summary of vital information that I learned. Those are the following: 1. Cloud computing has made it really easy to access all types of software or applications by different users and there will be no compatibility issue. 2. It can improve communication as everyone can use the same platform. 3. Employees have become more efficient by using cloud computing as there is a free access to unlimited procedures for providing an immediate solution. Even it can reduce downtime and searching.